Wednesday, 9 January 2008

My first club nite ONS

Here's a post from a while back of my first ONS.
Was still in the early stages and didn't know too much about inner game, the importance of qualifying, leading the interaction. Learnt a lot since, but have a long way to go. The game never ends.
Starting the afc way.. apologies for a long post..
Ive been out clubbing the past few months.. have gotten from
being unable to dance with a woman to getting pretty consistent day 2's and some F-closes..
Here's a LR of my first ONS..

Went out clubbing last weekend. Id done the usual ritual before leaving.. peackocking items, lil bottle of armani black code(women love it) in my back pocket, breath fresheners, lip balm, mints and fresh condoms.
I listened to a lil house to get me in the mood before i went out and drank a half bottle of wine for the lil happy buzz.
I used to go out smoking a spliff or two or drinking pint after pint of beer, but though that used to get me results.. nothing really like going in with just the slightest buzz.
Also I find that wine doesnt cloud your senses like most other alcohol does.
Went to an underground house place.. like house for the music.. tho i do prefer RnB places for pulling women.. RnB has this sensual music that makes it a lot easier to make out to. While i feel most women in clubs that play house go there just to dance.
I walked in.. the floor was kinda empty with just 7-8 girls on the floor. I went to the bar got myself a JD n coke, placed it on a table and walked up to one of the girls HB8 and started dancing with her. She asked me what my name was. I told her. In the background I was thinking jeez.. i shouldve met this girl later in the night.. this is too early on.. esp as the club closes at 0430. we danced for 2 songs and I got a little kino going. How do you all know each other? i pointed to her and her friends. She told me.
Thats one of the three sentences i always use on the dance floor..

You having a good night, I think youre cute and How do you all know each other. Id like to think it establishes a little false sense of familiarity and is a non aggressive, casual way of getting conversation started early on. She said she was going to the bar for a drink and asked me if i wanted one. guess I shouldve said yes and asked her to buy me one. But i didnt. She asked me to wait there, but when she didnt return 3-4 minutes later i started dancing with another two-set.
This seemed to be going pretty smoothly too.. when the HB8
returned and gave me eye contact. I didnt go dance with her or pawn the two set i had. Mistake. (My SP is that i cant run two-sets on the dance floor.. one, three and four sets are so much easier when it comes to isolating.
Maybe i should get a wing, but I have a wing who i used to think was good before, when i was just starting out a few months ago.. but now just spoils my sets whenever he enters them.. he does all the flash dance moves, doesnt maintain eye contact with the women, doesnt calibrate them, doesnt initiate kino, and mostly dances with me when we're in a two set.. he is brilliant at approaching sets and opening them however (which is good for me as I can game them).. but good at little else.. Ive told him about asf but he doesnt seem too intersted.. well his loss.. and mine too in a way.:-)
I was getting bored with the two set so I moved to a different set..
On the way there i danced with a set of guys who seemed to be having a good time. Thought Id recruit a wing on the dance floor which is what I often do. But i usually end up with guys who seem confident out of set but freeze when it comes to dancing with women.
I asked two guys to help me out and said lets dance with those three women there.. They smiled seemed enthusiastic and said lead the way.. When i did however, they just stood a few steps away and danced. I felt like a bit of an idiot trying to introduce these two guys, who were dancing 3-4 feet away facing us, who i didnt know from Adam to two women id met thirty seconds ago.
They smiled at them and continued dancing with me. Closing off their bodies to these two guys.

The attitude i try to portray when im on the dance floor is that Im a fun guy out to have a good time. I smile and laugh a lot, enjoy the music (no matter how bad i think it is) and dancing.
I make friends with the guys on the floor who look like theyre having a good time.
Often people come up to me and say 'Youre a player, man'. Music to my ears.. I say thank you and say 'lets dance with some women' but they often chicken out when it comes to dancing with the women. or even if they do they have poor BL, no kino, no eye contact, no smile etc etc..
Sometimes I go up to guys who seem to be doing well with the
women and tell them theyre players.. this seems to work wonders and they introduce me to new sets. Which i crash and burn with usually.. mmm, must think about why?

I approached another two set now.. and they ask me if I have
some pills.. I say no.. they say youre smiling and have a lot of energy.. we thought youd have some.. what about a spliff instead..
I truthfully tell them i dont have anything.. but if i find some, ill keep you in mind i say.. I have no intention of finding any.. im doing tonite drug free.. calibration is key.. they look at two afro carribean guys shaking booty and smile at each other.. i say you wanna dance with these two guys.. I dont wait for an answer and start dancing with the two afrocarib guys and introduce the two girls to them..
but these two guys dont handle it too well.. they didnt do too badly either.. i moved set again..
As i did another dance floor recon.. I stopped myself..

I find myself getting sucked up into the power of being able to dance with all the hottest women in the club.. and instead of doing what im out there for i.e. gaming women.. i shift from set to set.. sometimes it works well for me.. as i can often get back to sets ive danced with before when other sets dont go too smoothly.. also sets up social proof.. but it doesnt really help me gamewise.. because you cant get anywhere with a woman if you dont spend time with her in the first place.. at least 15 minutes usually..
I found that now i started getting anxious and losing state.. id approached a few sets and hadnt gotten anywhere really.. But i notice it.. wouldnt have if I had drunk a bit more or smoked a spliff..

chill out i reassured myself. STICK IN SET i tell myself.
Most important lesson ive learnt while clubbing.. apart from
escalating and advancing kino and look like youre having a good time.. is to STICK IN SET, something like Gunwitch's golden golden golden Persistence to Isolation rule.
I went back to the hb8 I saw initially, but she had seen me dance with other women.. and she moved away immediately..
I didnt let it bother me.. Ive had this happen so many times.. and will happen many more times.. I tell myself i shouldve pawned the two set i was dancing with before when she gave me eye contact..

I walk up to a chill looking guy who's dancing on his own and ask him to stay on adjacent sides of an imaginary rectangle/square as we dance L-formation.. I tell him 'watch the women come to us'.. (haha.. i know what some of you are thinking.. but dancing in a L-shape with a bit of space in front of you on a crowded dance floor usually has women come to dance.. or even if I dance with a lil 4x2ft space in front of me on floor the women come n dance in that space... and i approach them asap..
I usually approach women within a second or two of eye contact on the floor.. any longer and its crash n burn time..)
We're dancing L-formation, but this time the women dont come
to us.. well, didnt say it always worked, did I?

I look across however and make eye contact with a HB8, she's dancing with another guy.. but she keeps looking at me dancing.. I dont like approaching sets where a guy is already dancing with a girl.. theres more than enough sets on the floor for everybody (who knows how to make use of them, that is)..
I move to her and start dancing with her.. I dance for a minute.. I really like the way she dances.. she has a nice energy to her.. But im feeling like im intruding on them.. she continues to maintain eye contact with me though.. another guy comes and dances.. it looks like he knows the other guy.. and now its three of us dancing with one girl.. I get ready to shift set.. but i remember the talk i gave myself a few seconds earlier.. STICK IN SET.. so I decide to.. i smile at the guys and tap them on the shoulder.. and
shake their hands.. HB8 in the meantime continues to make eye contact with me.. the two guys move away.. I move in..

I smile and we dance together.. I start kinoing her..
simple touched on shoulder, hand.. then i slide my hands down her arms.. i keep eye contact and smile at her.. i start pacing my dancing to hers.. I ask her her name.. what she does.. fluff talk as i get my kino going..(yeah i know.. dont ask her her name.. if she asks you yours.. then thats an IOI.. but usually if i get kino going.. i just assume IOI's are happening.. or rather i assume IOI's as soon as they smile)..
I continue kino.. i run my hands down her arm and grab her
hands and squeeze.. she squeezes back..
Im In..
I move closer.. and run my hands down her back..

Whenever i start kinoing a woman on the dance floor, I act like im her boyfriend and do whatever he wouldve done.. women usually associate good feelings with comfortable sensual kino and when theyve been with their boyfriends on the floor.
She says she's off to get a drink and says she'll be back.. I wait for around 3-4 minutes.. then I think if I wait any longer Ill lose value.. so I re-approach a two set i had approached earlier..
L-formation guy is next to them.. I introduce him as my friend to them.. and continue dancing with them.. I find that HB8 has come to this part of the floor.. i see her, smile and pawn the two set and start dancing with her again..
I move in close and dance with her.. kinoing her back.. I touch foreheads, nose together.. and hey... Im not supposed to be doing this this early..
thats my kiss close technique.. never failed.. touch foreheads together, noses together, and them lips.. kiss close.. easy as that..
so i get my mind giving me second thoughts.. as i move in for the kiss..
thats because another promise ive made to myself is not to kiss women until after dancing with them for at least 15-20 minutes so I dont activate slut-defense.
So as im doing the forehead, nose.. I get my mind telling me This is too early on.. Ive mistakenly stumbled on my kiss close tech while im caught up escalating kino.. so as i touch foreheads, and nose i move away to her cheek.. and kiss her cheek.. then i get another thought that says.. Ill look like a dick if i kiss a woman on the cheek.. so now i find myself transitioning to her lips and kiss her (sounds pretty funny as i read it now).. she returns the

we continue dancing.. I continue kino..
im describing the kino as I go along, since its a FR.. and maybe some of you guys can give me more kino steps/tips..
I sniff her shoulders and neck.. kino her shoulders for a bit.. turn her around and slide my hands down her thighs and push my crotch against her butt.. and grind.. i turn her around again.. and we kiss again.. she seems to be initiating all the kisses.. i dont have a problem with that.. push-pull.. cat string.. im the prize.. you know the drill.. ;-)
I tell her Im sorry, but I have this thing about hugging.. and I hug her..
I learnt the hug after having had some xtc a while ago.. if theres one drug id recommend people try at least once its xtc.. more often than a month or two months tho' i seriously believe it fucks with you serotonin or happy receptors..
anyways.. heres the perfect hug IMHO.. from the xtc days..
Hug tightly for at least 4-5 seconds.. maintain a constant pressure..
hold your breath.. and break away suddenly.. feel the energy in the hug while youre doing it.. and as you break away.. eye contact and smile as you break away..
eye contact and appreciative positive reinforcement kino and a smile after a kiss is also ahem, mandatory..
I kiss her on her nose.. she has a really cute nose.. she says its a huge nose.. i dont agree.. she pulls away when i try to kiss it again..
all through the night i sneak kisses on her nose and smile.. i do this whole play acting thing of trying to kiss her nose as she pulls away.. holding her head as i kiss her nose.. sometimes jumping towards her and surprising her by kissing it.. works like a neg... and has an endearing feel to it too..
she introduces me to two girlfriends.. i smile at them.. theyre dancing with each other.. I ask her how they know each other..
I tell her my third standard club line.. I think youre cute.. I find that thats a neutral compliment.. its an IOI and you can use it on the drop dead gorgeous ones..( who'd probably construe it as a neg..) and the not so attractive one's either.. it an IOI.. establishes frame.. cute means lil girl cute and im the man..
i continue the kino.. a few more hugs.. she really likes them.. few more kisses.. i do the pull hair back firmly.. evolutionary position of surrender and softly bite her on the shoulders..

After a while she tells me her friends have left.. I offer to drop her off.. Persistence to Isolation.. I tell myself..
The club begins to close and we make our way out.. we're holding hands, hugging, laughing.. as I begin to walk her out..
she stays nearby, she tells me.. so we begin to walk.. I start talk-gaming her..
I do the cube, tell her im a mind reader and do my mind reader routine (see TnT post) .. she laughs.. i maintain the C&F frame.. continue to neg her about her nose.. when she tries to neg back I spank her playfully.. i ask her what her place is like, fluff talk about interior decor so i can tell her she must show me sometime..
I dont tell her that tho'.. i.e. you must show me sometime.. i leave that for when i get her number and call her..

we reach her place.. we stand outside.. its time for me to ask for her number.. but Persistence to Isolation sticks in my head..

I ask her the five magic words to get me inside her place.. 'May I use the bathroom'.. she says ok.. c'mon in.. the place is a mess though..
I enter.. its spotlessly clean.. i dont enter the bathroom.. I start kissing her, smelling her skin, smiling, tell her she's cute.. I fumble with her bra strap.. she tries to help me out.. i say.. no.. and me try again.. no luck until she does it herself.. we're both laughing through all this.. I take her pants off.. i read somewhere that if a woman takes her pants off she feels like a slut, while if you take her pants off she feels desirable.. we're soon naked and making out.. we've moved from her setee to her bedroom.. it was really cold in the living room.. cant wait for summer..
No LMR whatsoever.. i use push-pull, cat string.. tease her.. and we fade to black...

Got her number and called her yesterday.. C&F again.. ended the call while it was on a high note..we're meeting again tonite..
Im still learning.. feedback is valuable and appreciated..

(Credit: Moi)

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